Black Women with Natural Hair Men they Attract
Why are older men attracted to women with natural hair
Some young black women who are wearing two-strand twists, afros, Banti Knots, twist outs, braid outs, etc, say they are finding that older men are attracted to them and they are getting attention from men who are old enough to be their uncle, so what is the cause for this,
Some say its because men 50 and older remember the styles of the 60's and the afro style makes them reminisce of the past of hippies era.
So what ever the reason women who wear their hair in natural curly kinky styles are getting noticed and it is on a upswing and is positive.
It is causing women to love themselves more and the attention of a man who is attracted to their natural hair is more reason to keep up the fight for showing the world that it is okay to be different and conformity is not always the best especially if it is causing unnecessary damage to ones hair.
Black Hairstyles Natural Hair
When many women have decided to go natural after many years of wearing relaxed or permed hairstyles made the decision because they experienced too much hair breakage and damage from the strong no-lye cream relaxers they used since they were a child.
Many of the hair care products for black women are made with toxic chemicals and damaging ingredients that actually stops hair growth or causes hair loss.
So many women who have made the transition from relaxers to natural hair have noticed a difference in the men they attract.
While wearing your hair natural you may have noticed that the men who are more serious and deep thinkers are approaching your for your telephone number.
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Dating Men and Natural Hair
Men and natural hairstyles seem to be a interesting situation because since you are becoming more real about who you are.
Could it be that you are presenting a more confident vibe of self esteem so you attract men who are not superficial but down to earth and interested in who your are as a woman of beauty,
Some have even said they get compliments from men who are non-black as well as a new type of man, those who wear dreads or locs,
causing them to have more to say about what is going on in the economy from politics to music to business, which I would say is a definite plus.
Non-Black Men are attracted to Black women with Natural Hair
I have noticed this myself, now that I am natural I attract a more socially conscious, advocate male. I also see that I attract more white, and latin men as well.
Maybe its because of their fascination with black women in their natural state.
Having Confidence No Matter if Your Natural or Not
Although being natural is a choice, it is not the only option for black women. It is a decision that is made at one point in each of our lives.
If we want to have healthy hair then it has been proven that getting rid of chemicals is a step in the right direction.
It is not the total answer to proper hair care, once you become natural, transition from a relaxer either with the big chop or without cutting it.
Learn How to Take Care of Your Hair
Your next step will be to educate yourself, your partner and your family on what it will take to keep your hair is tip top condition.
Going to a hair salon that specializes in natural hair, locs, braids and twist outs can help with getting started on a reasonable routine to follow each day.
Experiment with different hair products
There are different products that will work for your hair and others will not, some of the more popular hair products include Karens Body Beautiful, Miss Jessies, Kinky Kurly Custard and many more.
One thing you will notice is that some of these products are cream based while others are water based, also your hair may do well with more protein while others find that too much protein in their hair makes it hard to manage.
Give your hair moisture on a daily basis
Either way your natural hair will need plenty of moisture from leave in conditioners, hot oil treatments, or essential oils such as olive oil, almond oil or tea tree oil.
Shea butter is a great option for adding moisture to natural hair when styling and after co-washing for braid outs or twists.
What natural styles get the most attention?
Well from the sources I read the braid out seems to be the popular look among men, they like the big wavy kinky curly styles as well as the two strand twists.
Curly puffs are also a favorite, but basically a nice blow out is good and for a simple sophisticated look a up do is also nice. If you are looking for a new and hot natural hairstyle one that is easy to do and has a really nice style is the fro hawk,
now this style looks good with curly hair and blow outs, first section off your hair in three big pony tails, then take the sides and pull it back maybe using a denman brush to smooth down the edges,
Then make sure the front is really high and the three seperate parts of hair is sectioned high down the middle of your head and your done, spray some sheen and your ready to go out on the town.
Love who you are no matter what your hair looks like
Wearing your hair straight with a relaxer is another option and it just takes learning how to take care of your hair. Getting your ends trimmed regularly and keeping your hair wrapped at night, whatever your beauty regimen is it is your responsibility to be committed to the growth of your hair and to be confident no matter how long, curly or kinky it is.
A mature, man will love you for who you are inside and if he is superficial and only likes you for what your hair looks like it is not worth the time to be with that man. We all change, evolve and grow and its best to have people in our lives that will contribute to the helping us become better not bring us down with their ignorance or lack of tolerance.
Black Men's Opinion on Natural Hair
Comments
thats great, thanks for sharing such an inspirational story, I noticed a lot more people wearing locs where I live too!
I would love to grow my hair, but the heat totally prevents me from doing that.
What you wrote is true.I went naturally grey.Men look and wink.I thought when I had my unnatural that was better.But I was wrong.Natural is better I get more compliments from men of all races.It's only been two months since the change.The men are staring.And saying you are so beautiful.Enjoying the journey.>peace.
Thats great, tamaril2 thanks for sharing your experience, it is a nice feeling to see others appreciate natural beauty, because artificial beauty is so overrated.
I was always told that black people would come down on you more for going natural than people of other races. I have not found that to be true. I have had locs for seven years and black people are forever telling me how good my hair looks. But whites and Latinos never say a word, but I live in Texas.
I actually got more ridicule from my own people when I relaxed my hair for 20 years. Now I get a kick out of black folks asking me for my stylist's card!
ladylocs you bring up a good point, locs, braids and even twist outs are more acceptable to other blacks in recreation and in the workplace, what is not so acceptable is wearing the afro natural kinky coily curls, most people are striving for the spiral curls over the kinky natural, so society perceptions of what is nappy and what is natural differs, but locs, mico braids and twist outs have always been a style that gets the green light.
Women with the confidence to go natural, are always more attractive, as long as they do not get the Big Head..:-)
I agree it can be a balancing act to be confident and self assured, when most of the world is slowly accepting natural hairstyles.
This caught my attention cause a few weeks ago ... or more... I saw Chris Rock talking about his new Doc Movie on black women's hair, what they spend and go through plus he was trying to get something going to stop the use of relaxers on Kids. It is a great flick what I saw on it and funny too. It's called "Good Hair" Here is the trailer. Too funny. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1m-4qxz08So
Bottom Line was be natural.
Nice, I was natural for 3 years, now I have relaxer, weave, all that stuff, but you are true about that "real recognize real" same for fake I guess
very true. even though the guy I am dating is not really old enough to be my uncle, he is 14 years older and really loves black women and natural hair. he grew up in the 70s and is obsessed with the era --he reminisces about the black unity and natural black beauty.
im a white girl olive complexed and your hair is so beautiful and so are u.i know u kinow your hair going to look the best anyway because u wear your natural hair and u dont put any relaxers in it.thats what damages natural hair.your hair is going to keep on growing because u were it natural and its not going to be damage.if anyone says somethuing bad about your hair their just jealous because u are so pretty.Beautiful i mean
I saw a youtube video where the girl was natural and she interviewed her boyfriend to ask him why some men prefer straight hair on african american woman. His answer was interesting, he said that black men need to be educated and need to know that just because a sista wears her hair natural does not mean she is trying to be political.
I guess he felt that his peers were intimidated by a black woman with a natural. Which to me is kind of odd since black men have natural hair.
Then he went on to say that young black men are more comfortable with or used to straight hair on African American women because that is what their moms and sisters wear.
It would be nice if people would just accept the fact that the way a woman wears her hair is just a fashion statement and not always having a deeper spiritual meaning, even if it is the case for some.
Then I saw another youtube video where the hair stylist was offering to provide straight hairstyles to women of color who had naturally curly non-chemically treated hair.
So the stylist said something like, "see my hair model is natural and she is not a Erykah Badu, incense wearing, pro-black girl" then he went on to say that this is because she is a "new age" natural girl and she gets manicures and pedicures.
I was really shocked that blacks still stereotype each other, is the stylist trying to say that if a woman chooses to go natural that some how she no longer is interested in grooming herself.
Its ridiculous!
I find it intriguing how black women try to lure the "world" into going natural. Subtly indicating ways life would be better now that you are "natural" and not "superficial"... Ladies what makes you natural is the love you have inside for yourself that radiates from within and around you. We are not our hair. Natural hair or relaxers does not define you as a person. Hence, a natural doesn't make you confident, intellectual or sophisticated just as a perm does not make you fake or superficial. The way we decide to dress and accessorize our physical appearance, including our hair is merely a matter of preference tailored to what we deem fitting for ourselves and not a judgment of our character. Most women (not all) are going natural merely because it has erupted as a trend, and not because of an individual decision to be unique and free. Some"naturals" caim they are natural, but then go and "straighten their hair with heat, dye their "natural" hair color red or blond and wear blue colored contacts and acrylic nails... Hence, contradicting their definition of "natural". The fun and beauty of being a woman is to expirement with different ooks, This does not equal self hatred. Some dark wommen bleach their skin to attain a lighter olor and see the attack and condemnation of our feelow sisters! Caucasian women, Hispanic women, and many other nationalities bleach their skin to attain a brighter complexion. Do they hate themselves too? Because they are....white? White women tan their skin to achieve a darker complexion but they are not attacked by their fellow Caucasian sisters. They die, fry, inject their lips and hips to achieve a certain look that they want for themselves. That is what I admire about them, They don't give a damn what everyone else thinks because at the end of the day it makes them feel better, which is all that really maters. Regardless of the reason, my point is natural hair does not bring about anything but the satisfaction you yourself gain from attaining it. I get tired of sisters encouraging women that natural is the way to go for black women. "Natural" is not meant for everyone, and some women just prefer straight hair...nothing wrong with that. Most white women have naturally curly hair, but you will never see it curly! They don't point fingers at each other saying, "You are unnatural,go curly and embrace your inner beauty". To me, natural has nothing to do with hair or makeup, but rather heart and spirit. One who does not conform to societal trends and demands is "natural" and one who stands up and embraces what they believe is natural. Do what you feel fit to make yourself feel beautiful, and that is where you will gain freedom and confidence. Each person has their own sense of taste and style and there is nothing wrong wrong with altering your appearance/hair to get the look you desire, so long as you're doing it for you. Do what you wanna do, twist, perm, die, fry, go natural or bald, Just remember You are beautiful, You are not your hair and You only live once, and in this life, the only thing constant is change.
I only wish our black women could join hands to form a powerful movement focusing on something deeper than vanity, such as increasing higher education in Blacks. If we could stop the spread of dropout rates the way we are trying to stop the spread of a "just for me" perm box...WOW...that would be great! Let's redirect our focus...On less trivial matters...
MIss Diva...I'm 14 yes, people can wear their hair however they want, but all most of us trying to say here is that, natural is the best for African-American hair and it could make you more happy. It has nothing to do with vanity, so your rant is irrelevant.
THIS COMMENT IS FOR MISSDIVA.
IT SEEMS TO ME THAT YOU HAVE BEEN OFFENDED BY THE COMMENTS ON ENCOURAGEMENT FOR WOMEN OF AFRO DECENT TO wear the hair natural.
it is QUITE OBVIOUS THAT YOU ARE CONTINUOUSLY TRYING TO LIVE UP TO WESTERN STANDARDS OF BEAUTY IN WHICH YOU CANNOT ATTAIN. you are most likely the type of black person that continues to live in an illusion.
we KNOW WHATS BEST FOR US AND YOU KNOW IT TOO. DON'T TRY TO ACT STUPID LIKE YOU DON'T KNOW.
THE ONGOING DILEMMA WITH BLACKS IN AMERICA AND THE SOCIOECONOMIC PROBLEMS ARE MORE DEEPER THAN JUST TELLING THEM TO IMPROVE THEIR LIVES, AND IM PRETTY SURE YOU KNOW THAT TOO.
IT IS A CONTINUOUS CYCLE THAT STARTS AT HOME.
Hair is vanity youngster, so your rant is irrelevant.
To the person above:
I don't believe I need a certain hairstyle to define who or what I really am. My point is that hairstyling is merely a way to accessorize or express your self, your style or desire (just as your outfit, makeup or nails) I personally am of African descent I have no problem mixing western culture with African culture, I don't believe there is anything wrong with that. Clearly you have no idea what type of "black" person I am just because I state a point of view. I may have a fro right now and still feel this way! Don't get it twisted. I am not against afros or any other hairstyle, I've just stated how I feel about the matter. I know my roots,my self and my natural being.. I embrace it and it has NOTHING to do with the hair coming out of my scalp. May be an illusion to you but think deeper hon....you are not your hair :)
"we KNOW WHATS BEST FOR US AND YOU KNOW IT TOO. DON'T TRY TO ACT STUPID LIKE YOU DON'T KNOW." This comment shows how stupid you are, because clearly whats best for you is different from whats best for another person. Please don't try to lump all black people together because we are a race of many cultures, different hair textures and VERY different mentalities.
p.s. not offended, like I said just intrigued (google it)
I don't notice the difference in the attention from man. I guess it depends on which area you live in.
This is an interesting article which has created many different points and responses from the comment section. I feel that while some agree, some also disagree with the article's premise : being that, women of African descent who wear their hair naturally attract a man who is more "down-to-earth", conscious of culture and modern dialogues.
While this may be true for some, judging by the comments, it is not true for others. I believe that the type of person that you are radiates from you and effectively attracts the type of person you are going for. However, society does put different costumes on us because they help us weed out different personalities from the rest: making it easier for us to "naturally select" who we want to have in our lives. It may be Darwinian of me to say so, but it seems that our primal instinct is survival.
For example, if you were hurt and in need of assistance and you saw two people running towards you; one is wearing a doctors uniform and the other is just dressed casually, who would you want to receive help from? Of course, these are obvious costumes or uniforms that we see in our everyday lives that affect many of the decisions we make on who to trust and what not. I think the beauty of this article is that it points out some of the less obvious costumes or points of culture that are emerging within the black community as well. Is it something to get defensive over? Is it something that is always true? Not really, but it is interesting
This comment is FOR MISSDIVA.(Don't worry, it's good!)
Black women seem to have ganged up against what you were trying to say, but I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND where you are coming from. Our hair is made such topics of debate, while our black society is crashing with each minute of each day over unimportant issues (such as our hair). We are being brought Front and Center in our vain society instead of murder, education, health care, the elderly, and blacks outnumbering all races in jail. I found it very difficult when I read all these replies about a black woman deciding to go natural or not, and what society thinks, other blacks think, what men think when it's all a matter of personal choice.
I'll wear my hair however I want, and WILL NOT worry about nor deal with such backlash over whatever decision I choose. Why? Because I and every other woman, black or white, GOT IT LIKE THAT!
Find another subject to make someone feel bad about and leave MISSDIVA to her own safe frame of mind.
PS: AND ALL OF YOU NEED TO LEARN HOW TO SPELL.
I think women should wear their hair however they choose. To some people, it's just hair. To others, it's more than that. I do agree with Miss Diva in the sense that women should wear whatever makes them happy. Confidence shows and people can see it. Confidence is attractive. I am natural and I chose to be this way because the health of my hair was deteriorating. I care greatly about overall health including clean eating, exercising, hygiene, and healthy hair. I don't care if women want to wear perms, weaves, wigs, etc. Do whatever you want. I just know what I like. Natural is just better for me because I never liked spending a lot of time on my hair. When I was relaxed, I often just wore ponytails. I have never been really big on how my hair looked. I didn't care much. The natural hair allows me to spend minimal time and still have healthy and great looking hair. I personally don't believe that chemicals are healthy. That is only my opinion. Natural hair also works for me because, as I stated before, I'm a fanatic for promoting overall health. That does include mental/emotional and public health. Many women still like the relaxed look and that's great! I'm not going to jump on them because I do remember that once upon a time, I was also relaxed :) Now I hope no one takes my comment personally. If you are relaxed and you like your relaxed hair, keep it! Rock it! It works for you! If you are natural and you like it natural, keep it! Rock it! It works for you! If you are bald, keep it! Rock it! It works for you! I see beauty through many different eyes whether it's the kind of person you are, the way you carry yourself, the way you look (hygiene, well groomed, well dressed), or your culture. A rainbow is made up of many different colors, but a rainbow is not a rainbow without those many different colors. Rainbows are beautiful :) So in short, do what you do and do it well!
I love this article! About 5 months ago I decided to transition to natural, then 2 months in I did TBC. This article has been pinned to my desktop through the whole process and every time I need a little motivation, I just re-read it. Growing up in a proedominately white neighborhood, it was "right" for girls to have long straight hair. Naturally, I followed suit to fit in.
Now, being a young single black woman, I found it hard to find "Mr. Right" but I still believed that God would put him in my life and I wouldn't have to go out of my way to find him. He'll be in the environments that I frequent. For 2 years, that didn't happen. I could barely get a decent man to even look my way it seemed!
Since I cut my hair, EVERYTHING has changed. I'll wear a 2 strand twist, blow out, or just a wash and go and not many days go by that I don't get a compliment on my hair. People of all races will comment, but it's mostly white older women who compliment. I do, however, notice that with relaxed hair, I attracted more men my age (especially black) but with natural hair, I get the older black men but more so from men of all ages in other races. Currently I'm dating a man from Peru who is 10 years older than me and I couldn't be happier :)
So THANK YOU for giving me inspiration to chop and a little hope in finding love even with my TWA.
BkCreative 3 years ago
You know what I am finding Research Analyst?- with my natural hair? Men other than Black men are big big big fans.
I'm in Brooklyn where everyone in the world lives and I have a young friend with the big natural (she's also stunning by the way) - and the white men and foreign men are sooo enamored. So many white males and females are walking around here with locs.
When I lived in Korea my locs were so popular. First time I went all the hip young people were doing the braids - by the time I got back the 3rd year they had opened loc studios and had mastered the look!
Anyone who could do locs would make good money over there - especially around the colleges!
Thanks for your great natural hair hubs - I love them!